Ruth Writes is a 30-something Liverpool based blog covering mid-size fashion, pescatarian food and beauty.
Recently I have become more conscious than ever of the mental list of ‘things women must do’ before they leave their 20’s behind and join the 30’s club. Why is is that a women’s worth is measured by a baby and a ring on her left hand? Since when did career, travel and personal goals, those that don’t include a man or woman, edge further down the every growing list of demands from the woman, who wants it all?
Let me side-track for a moment and try to redeem myself before I begin to sounds like a Carrie Bradshaw wannabe and I use the line, ‘I gots to thinking’- however I do feel she has a part to play in this. This may read as the ramblings of a single woman, who on the flip side of 25 is still trying to figure out what to do with her life, and yes to a point I can’t argue that, but it baffles me how women such as Beyonce and Jennifer Lawrence, are celebrated as being seen as women who have it all and yet women are fighting to gain equality to men in the workplace and in the bedroom, yet the top ticks on the list include babies and marriage. I suppose a quick glance at Beyonce’s tumblr does show Blue Ivy and Jay Z by her side in most photos so….
One of my favourite shows at the moment is GIRLS. I love that Lena Dunham spent an entire episode in a green bikini from American Apparel and didn’t give a shit about her size. Shows like GIRLS and Sex and The City celebrate modern women, yet the heart of every storyline is relationships. Yes I do realise I’m starting to rant………
This post was spawned from a couple of conversations that have happened in my work recently. Maybe it is because I’m 4 years from 30 and haven’t completed ‘the list’, but I just hate the fact that there’s an unwritten agenda that you must adhere too and if you don’t, its acceptable to be asked why not.
I think this ‘need to have it all’ stems back to our Facebook feeds. We read mundane status updates from girls we went to school with and subsequently haven’t seen since, or actually even intend to speak to, since we left over 10 years ago, yet we are in-undated with photos of their 2+ kids who have food-stained t-shirts and a pictures of that girl you vaguely recognise from year 11 who hasn’t ran a brush through her hair since the back end of 2011- is this what we are #jel of? I like to think a big fat no.
I know what I would rather- being woken up by a wine induced headache at the weekend as opposed to a screaming child. The only reason I have to be semi functioning in the AM on the weekend is to upload pics from the night before to Instagram/Facebook/Twitter, before falling back into a blissful sleep. The tick tock of a woman’s biological clock may be her holy grail who sits next to you in work, who you over hear moaning to her mate in the pub cos he won’t commit or that girl crying in ASDA cafe (just for the record we don’t know why she was crying, but she looked pretty sad), but I’m good. I mean my main decision I have to make this week is what festival do I attend this year. Babies? Lets add it onto the 30’s list….maybe.